Jodo Kast Dec 27, 2009
2010 is almost upon us and this new economy has inspired me to make resolutions in accordance with it. In fact, there is only one such resolution that makes any sense.
1. ELIMINATE THE NEED FOR MONEY
I figure that will pretty much solve all of my problems. First of all, I would no longer have to go to my extremely boring and irritating job, nor would I need a car. The primary reason for owning a car is so that I have a way to get to work. Without the need for money, I would not need a job and I would also not need a car. I could easily ride a bike to the gym or to the grocery, but my workplace is 15 miles distant and a safe bike route would likely exceed 25 miles, nor would it even be remotely close to safe. The United States is designed around the automobile; the whole place here is completely fucked up, in my opinion. The roads themselves increase the carbon dioxide entering the atmosphere, since no plant life can grow on them and live for very long.
Anyway, I can't eliminate the need for money without eliminating myself, so I must accept this horrible reality in which I exist. It's important to understand that I did not design the United States, nor am I in charge. There's nothing I can do to make things better. For example, why is fast food legal?
Most people are not aware that fast food is unhealthy; this is why it is legal. Also, most people are not aware that cigarettes are unhealthy, despite the massive negative marketing against them. However, I don't actually believe a lack of knowledge can explain why those things are legal. The reason why they are legal is because they generate a lot of money in taxes that the government can use to accomplish their goals. This explains why certain drugs, such as cocaine and marijuana, are not legal. The goverment would have trouble taxing them, so they simply make them illegal. This also explains why prostitution is not legal; it would be difficult to collect that tax money.
Why do I have to sit down and figure this stuff out, these basic things about reality? Why, for instance, are we not taught in grade school to avoid fast food? Even worse, why do they serve fast food in grade schools? The United States is not a very intelligent nation. This is why many Asian nations completely destroy our students' test scores. In the United States, we WANT extremely fat people with vast overflowing bellies to be able to buy 8 f---ing boxes of Dove ice cream bars with food stamps. I'm not making this shit up; I've seen it. I saw a very large black man and his wife buy vast quantities of junk food with food stamps at my local Schnucks grocery store. I was thinking to myself, Why does the government support this bullshit? They gave that fat couple the food stamps. Why? Why? Why? Why is a fat person allowed to get junk food for free? If a man with a very large stomach walks into a building and tries to get food stamps, he should be turned away, simply on account of the fact that he is well-fed. That man does not need more food - he needs knowledge. He needs to know that simply by changing his diet he can lose the gigantic mountainous distension flowing over his belt. And he can save a lot of money, too. There is no need for food stamps if one eats healthy, because that type of food is much cheaper.
You can not imagine how angry this country makes me, because we have the ability to make it better. There are people like myself that know how to make it better. It seems to me that the first thing to do would be to remove all of the lawmakers and politicians and replace them with people that want to improve the country. For example, the lawmakers and politicians we have right now do not want to improve the United States. They are not making laws to outlaw fast food, for example. They are not making laws to ban cigarettes. They are not making laws against obesity. My God, if you like looking at giant amorphous bellies and asses, then come to the United States, THE LAND OF DISGUSTING FAT PEOPLE THAT ARE FULLY SUPPORTED BY THE GOVERNMENT.